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You made it. Bitch u did it!!! Moved to another country, started a beautiful life, living in a cottage, and are designing a full collection. You’re a fashion designer, artist, and cook. Everything you’ve always wanted. Bichhh Im out! Kisses
There was a time (long ass time really) where I felt really bad and I didn’t see it ending. It felt like despair. I lived like that for years. And I couldn’t even tell you why because to this day, I don’t know what it was. But I got through it. I’m no longer drowning. I think it’s my art that saved me. A lot of people drove me here but in the end, the art came through. I always thought we’d be saved together but somewhere along the way, you checked out and left me alone. I hated you for a long time. I hated you while I was checking on you throughout the years. I did it out of emotional obligation. Or maybe I did it because i knew that if you didn’t exist anymore, I couldn’t either. Cause we were sisters. It was the most impactful relationship I’ve ever had in my life and maybe that’s why it took me years to get over the fact that one of us didn’t feel the same anymore.
I saw you once, you know. Back in 2020. You were in a tree. Happy how I remembered. You were light again. It was so refreshing to see and hear you that way. You visited me and told me everything. How you left because you couldn’t deal with life anymore, how you were so much happier there instead of here. I think this was the moment I stopped hating you. You can’t hate someone for saving themselves from darkness. For giving up. Shits hard, I understood. But I miss you terribly. So much that I feel part of you became my daughter. When she jokes, it’s so much like you. So even if you’re gone, I didn’t lose all of you. Anyways, I’ve come to terms with the fact that you’ll never mentally be back. You gave me years of friendship and sisterhood that I’ll never forget.
I hope you’re doing well. Thanks sea.
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